Co-Parenting can be one of the most challenging and stressful issues you have to face in the relationship with your child’s father. After all there is obviously a reason that you are no longer in a relationship with them. However, successful co-parenting is crucial to the well-being of your children and will also give you peace of mind. I often listen to the broadcasts from Focus on the Family during the week, and last week they had a broadcast about co-parenting and helping your child thrive after divorce with Ron Deal and Tammy Daugherty. I found it useful and hopefully if you listen you can snag a few tips that improve your co-parenting relationship. Click on the links below to listen to the broadcasts. Co-Parenting: Helping Your Child Thrive After Divorce
When a relationship ends between two people they go through a time of adjustment, and that can be very difficult period and eventually it will usually get better. But, every once in awhile you hit a snag. That is what happened to me yesterday. What started out as a typical conversation with my daughter’s father soon turned into an argument. I have not had an argument with him in ages, basically we get along and I decided a long time ago not to let myself argue with him or say harsh words. After all why should I? We had good times, we have a beautiful daughter, and arguments never lead to anything positive. But yesterday was a different story.
We had an argument about something he said that offended me, that pushed my buttons, and was something we had quite a few disagreements about last year. Afterward he told me he was only joking, I did not find it funny, and then somehow the conversation took on a life of its’ own. The past was drudged up and old wounds were reopened. It was not pretty. To make a long story short, we both hung up feeling angry and hurt. When I left work I felt sad, hurt and angry. I asked God to forgive me and to take away the bad feelings I had felt.
Well the evening went on, and usually he calls Anya before she goes to sleep. It was getting late so I called him and let her talk with him. Afterwards when I got on the phone, we both apologized, I think we both knew that we did not want to go to sleep without apologizing.
Listen ladies, if you are a single mom most likely you are going to have a relationship with the father of your children. It is up to you to make the best out of that relationship. Now, don’t get me wrong they should make the effort also. However, you are not responsible in the eyes of God for their actions you are responsible for yours. You take the initiative and be the Peacemaker. Even if you feel you are 100% correct, swallow your pride and be the peacemaker because God is watching your actions. Treat your ex like Jesus would treat people. We are human and it is not always easy to turn the other cheek or to give an apology when you feel as though you are right. But God will bless you for it. You are a child of God therefore it is your duty to be a peacemaker. You are not to cause strife, you are not to spew harsh criticisms, you are to love one another whether or not they are in your home any longer.
After our apologies, last night we chatted a little longer and had a good conversation. I know for a fact that I slept better last night knowing that I sincerely apologized and asked for God’s forgiveness for my own anger. It is much easier to be a peacemaker than to be someone who harbors anger and resentment. Let’s walk in the footsteps of Jesus and be peacemakers, loving those around us.